“Chilling in not-Scotland”

Films: Beneath Loch Ness (2001)

Alias: None

Type: Ancient

Location: Lake

Height/Weight: That of a humpback whale.

Affiliation: Neutral

Summary: And now we see for ourselves the second most famous cryptid of all for another time. Bigfoot gets his time in the spotlight so many times, it isn't even funny. But what is funny is that people thought that they could pass this very clearly U.S.-based city as Scotland in the first place!

History: In Califor-I mean Scotland, the Loch Ness monster has been making a bit of a fuss. A similar lake monster has been beached because of her, and people are getting snatched up. The truth is that Nessie now has a brood of eggs, and does NOT appreciate the company. Naturally, this places a gigantic bounty on her head.

Notable Kills: Nothing special.

Final Fate: As if this film couldn't get more insulting to the Scottish lands, a hunter dons makeup like he's at a "Braveheart" festival, takes a harpoon laced with explosives, spends some time skewering Nessie's eggs, and blows up both himself and the monster. However, there are signs that Nessie's lineage might not be gone forever...

Powers/Abilities: None.

Weakness: Anything conventional.

Scariness Factor: 3-As a titan of the lake, Nessie should be scarier. She is helped by a rather unconventional yet burly design, but altogether, the low-grade CGI holds her back. Such a sad fate. Also, no, we are not in Scotland. I don't know how much more we can emphasize that.

Trivia: -Like just about everything "Scottish" in this film, the loch itself looks wrong. It is shown with crystal clear water rather than the brownish, murky tannin tub that it is. And that's not an insult either. It's actually quite natural. But then, Nessie would have been even harder to see underwater, we guess.

-People have been searching for Nessie for decades, but frequent searches and even DNA collections have determined that her existence is very, VERY unlikely. For one thing, Loch Ness is extremely cold, so it wouldn't make for a very hospitable environment for such a large animal.


Image Gallery


That's no Nessie! THAT'S A FREAKING KAIJU!

They raised Nessie's brother from the dead!
Like why do crocodiles keep smiling? Like this one?

Worst babysitters ever.
Turns out, snakeheads are the real problem.

"OFF MY LAWN, MAN!"
Evil? No respect for nature, I tell you.



Trailer(s)