“Total...Global...Saturation”

Films: Resident Evil (2002), Resident Evil: Apocalypse (2004), Resident Evil: Extinction (2007), Resident Evil: Afterlife (2010), Resident Evil: Retribution (2012), Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (2017)

Alias: The Red Queen, Doctor Alexander Isaacs, Albert Wesker, the Las Plagas parasite, the Cerberus, the Lickers, the Uber Lickers, the T-Virus undead, Matthew Addison/Nemesis, infected crows, the Tyrants, the Axemen, the Majini undead, the Kipepeo Infectors, the J’Avo, the Bloodshot

Type: Man-Made/Mutant

Location: Haunted home/Civilized Area/Desert/Tundra

Height/Weight: Ranges from that of average crows to that of a large car (the Kipepeo).

Affiliation: Evil

Summary: For all you video game players out there, us included, one of Capcom's greatest franchises (for better or worse) is the "Resident Evil" franchise. Part corny dialogue machine, part survival horror tour de force (mostly), this franchise has had the highest highs and the lowest lows. Among those lows was this film franchise, which asks the perplexing question, "What if we were to squander all of the games' potential enjoyment in favor of shoving Paul Anderson's wife in everyone's faces?".

History: A long time ago, the Umbrella Corporation’s founder, Dr. James Marcus, raced to find a way to bring his daughter Alicia back from the brink. He succeeded with the Progenitor Cell, but when that proved to be a dangerous reanimator, he was killed by Albert Wesker, the lackey of Doctor Alexander Isaacs, who saw great bioengineering potential in Marcus' work. With Marcus in charge, Umbrella becomes insanely profitable, he develops the Red Queen AI in Alicia's image, and the Progenitor Cell is remade into the deadly bioweapon known as the T-Virus. Alas, such hubris must be punished, as the T-Virus eventually breaks out, with Umbrella trying to profit off of the ensuing global infection and rise of a litany of hideous undead monsters. Only one woman stands in the way of mankind's total extinction. Namely, Alice, who is actually a clone of Alicia, and keeps getting cloned too.

Notable Kills: Nothing special.

Final Fate: Everything Umbrella, and life in general, throws at Alice doesn't stop her in the slightest. She just keeps getting back up one way or another, and beats man and beast into nothing. In particular, Nemesis is crushed by a falling helicopter after turning on his creators and helping Alice. Isaacs, the idiot who started this foolishness in the first place, is killed by one of his own clones before that clone is devoured by a zombie horde. And Wesker is blown up along with the willing Red Queen/Alicia so that the T-Virus, and everything Umbrella stood for, dies out. The Earth finally starts to recover from the outbreak thanks to a released anti-virus, but Alice makes it her mission to finish off whatever abominations remain.

Powers/Abilities: Amazing regenerative abilities, huge resilience to pain, sheer numbers.

Weakness: Heavy artillery, the anti-virus.

Scariness Factor: 4-As much as the effects team can seem to just give up at times (CGI doesn't always hold up), there's no doubt that the body horror-laden spirit of the games can be found in most of the monsters. Some particularly nasty beasts include the Cerberus dogs, the Lickers, and the thousands of zombies all around. The most intimidating of the beasts is Nemesis, appropriate considering how much of a menace he was in his own game...even if he's a chump compared to that guy.

Trivia: -Alice has absolutely no presence in the original games. The characters from that, like Jill Valentine and Chris Redfield, are all killed in the films in one way or another despite being very much alive as of this writing.

-For what it's worth, Paul Anderson has made it clear that he wanted to make a faithful adaptation of the Resident Evil franchise, and Alice's actress, Mila Jovovich, starred in the first film due to her and her younger brother loving the games as well. Of course, that was how Paul and Mila met. Then again, considering the dip in quality the game franchise slumped into after RE4 for a while...you can't say he wasn't faithful. Oh, and he got signed on to the "Monster Hunter" movie. God...dammit...


Image Gallery


A franchise that should have never been.


Not tired of zombies yet? You will be.

"Can't I have have a moment of peace!?"

The genes of tired sequels take root.


Protests? Can we do that? Is that what that means?

Stevie was just a few days away from zombie retirement.

She is not hope. She is stagnation.

Yet another iconic zombie left to be desecrated forever.

What happens when Cerberus breeding goes unregulated.

The storm of two more sequels brews.


Terry Crews, NO!
Home is where the lack of heart is.


The Butt Witch really let herself go in the apocalypse.
Prepare to get tired of this trend, folks!


"Micheal Vick KICK!"


Good luck remembering any bit of the plot after this movie.


A franchise cancellation would be more hopeful.

We'll spare you the true horror of this film as the Curse of Evil Tim plays out.

A dimension that tires us all out!

"Free hugs? We would like that, boring lady!"

Now would be a good time to run.

For a final end to this all.


Dr. Salvador, there goes the clean bill of health!
You're not Batman. Stop it.


Oh, look! A manifesation of the stagnation this has gotten to!
At least Japan's on the ball...right?


Don't make us ground-I mean, shut you down!

Don't do drugs, fellow Lickers.


Cue random heavy metal noises.

Dear God, SPARE US, PLEASE! NO MORE SEQUELS!

Klaus Kinski really let himself go.


Let me guess. The WWE wants him now.

Wesker Vs. DIO wasn't such a good idea, honestly.

The explosions were enough, but the water waste?

Old rivals meet once more.

"Let's finish this the way we started it! With questionable CGI!"

Atlantis, sadly, also fell prey to this.

"What? Was I supposed to upgrade into a woman now?"
Endure the franchise.

Trust us, that about covers it.

Dinner time for the Licker: Remember to bring a mop.

"Oh, yeah!"


"STARS!"

"Surely, shooting the swarm will work!"

"This is for not putting me in the first film, you twats!"

Saturation is on the way...

ACK! TOO MUCH WHITE!

Even in this remake, the Matrix hasn't gone out of style for him.

Only rabid Umbrella Corp fans.


I knew the Trump presidency was going to end badly, BUT COME ON!
The director's reign, for instance.




Trailer(s)