“Restorting to nonsense”

Films: Club Dread (2004)

Alias: Sam Colleti, the Fun Police

Type: Natural

Location: Civilized Area

Height/Weight: That of an average human.

Affiliation: Evil

Summary: What better place to pick off victims than a bustling beach resort where the people have more hormones than brains? It's classic! And better, you can act just as clownish as the rest of the cast so that no one expects a thing until the knives come out and the comedy takes a turn for the pitch black!

History: Sam "Fun Police" Colleti was mad with vengeance after a friend used his weed without his permission. Oh, sorry, that was just a minor offense. No, the real reason Sam became a vicious serial killer on the Costa Rican Pleasure Island is because its owner was fully intent on selling it to the military, but then gave it to his nephew instead. Fueled by jealousy, Sam brandished a knife carved by Mayans, a good tribal get-up, and proceeded to terrorize everyone who dared set foot on the island. And for him, those people weren't exactly hard to find...

Notable Kills: Guts a guy in a fruit suit while disguised as a pineapple mascot, carves words into a guy before parachuting him to the beach, launches a flaming arrow into a small boat full of gasoline to blow it up (much to everyone's inexplicable joy), drops a tv into a swimming pool to shock a guy, and puts that stupid nephew's decapitated head onto his record player, still spinning.

Final Fate: After his identity is revealed, Sam is entrapped between rope and a piece of the harbor's walkway. The rope tightens just enough to rip him in half. His upper half expires after a while, but his lower half hasn't quite given up the chase.

Powers/Abilities: None...unless some Mayan hoo-haa made parts of his body immortal.

Weakness: Anything conventional.

Scariness Factor: 4-For such a low-brow comedy, from the same guys who made "Super Troopers" no less, this is one hardcore villain. Sure, there are some laughable qualities about Sam, but for the most part, this sadistic bastard is a petty nutcase who kills people in a myriad of awful ways. Nice costume too.

Trivia: -In spite of featuring a rather non-flattering caricature of Jimmy Buffet, this film was rather adored by the famous musician, who even based some of his songs on it.

-This film was done by Broken Lizard, a comedy troupe known for various comedies of varying quality, as well as having no official leader.

Image Gallery

Believe me. That knife is for somebody very deserving here.
To instill true dread, might as well put in a shark or two here.
Remember. THIS is the killer.
"What?! I thought Predator was a documentary!"