“Walberg's lament”

Films: The Happening (2008)

Alias: All plants

Type: Natural

Location: Civilized Area/Forest

Height/Weight: That of an average plants.

Affiliation: Neutral

Summary: Two years before he cursed the world with one of the most reviled adaptations of a beloved cartoon, M. Night Shyamalan continued his downward spiral of bad cinema with perhaps one of the biggest fails at suspense yet. He went for Hitchcockian horror...and to say he came out with pure comedy gold instead would be an understatement.

History: All of the sudden on a nice sunny day, people begin to kill themselves in any way they can. This mass suicide has an explanation, so bear with us. Apparently, the plants of the U.S. have developed a neurotoxin that causes people to just want to off themselves. And the toxin is spreading...

Notable Kills: One person smashes his head many, many times into a window before it gives. All in the name of dying.

Final Fate: Our heroes manage to evade the toxin wherever they go, and just when things look bad, the outbreak ends. However, some see it as just a taste of a worse outbreak, and there are words of one happening in France now…

Powers/Abilities: The toxin causes a person to drop whatever they're doing, and kill themselves through whatever means necessary.

Weakness: Anything conventional.

Scariness Factor: 3-It's plants. Just regular, non-moving plants. Anything like this would be a dead 1 on the scale...except that uncontrollable urges to die aren't funny. In fact, it's actually kind of horrifying seeing all of these people go out in unsettling ways with no provocation whatsoever. In the hands of a better director, this would have been a true nightmare.

Trivia: -This film was once just a script known as "The Green Effect", and every studio rejected it before it got produced. Of course, Shyamalan took notes from every meeting, gave it an R-rating for the first time in his career...and it was still critically savaged.

-To this day, Mark Walberg considers this to be his most embarrassing role ever, and would give anything to omit it from reality. "F*#%king trees", indeed.

Image Gallery

Many bad movies...we all should have seen this coming...and now, it's happening.

MLP FIM ended. GET OVER IT. Actually, this isn't funny.
We know. The director ran out of ideas.

Reality is distorting to fit this horrible movie!