“Fog-get about it”

Films: The Fog (2005)

Alias: Various, notably William Blake

Type: Mystical

Location: Civilized Area

Height/Weight: Indescribable.

Affiliation: Neutral, leaning on evil

Summary: Remakes are a fickle thing. You make them usually because you either think you can tell the original story better, or you just want to swim in piles of money. Alas, whoever greenlit this film probably won't be seeing the latter, and was almost certainly not going for the former.

History: The story largely remains the same, but with a few differences. Captain William Blake came to Antonio Island, Oregon to find a home for his colony of lepers, but the people there took advantage of his humble goal, and killed him and the rest of his crew to get at the riches he had stashed in his ship, the Elizabeth Dane. Oh, and they made sure to do it on a foggy night. After the thieves used their takings to found the place as their own, Blake and his crew waited for decades before rising back from the dead to kill the people living on Antonio Island. For this island’s 134th anniversary would be their last.

Notable Kills: Circle a man with glass shards that slice through him one by one.

Final Fate: After many have died at these revenants' hands, one of the survivors realizes that she's the direct reincarnation of Blake's wife. She kisses the spirit, becomes one herself, and departs along with the rest of the ghosts. Um...WHAT?!

Powers/Abilities: Major psychic powers, invincibility

Weakness: None.

Scariness Factor: 4-We'll give it this. These ghosts are stronger and just as ugly as their 1980's counterparts. But the whole thing is diminished by the fact that these ghosts are mostly portrayed by CGI in contrast to the eeriness of the red-eyed beings from over two decades ago. Also, that ending. Really?

Trivia: -William Blake was played by Rade Sherbedgia, a Croatian actor known mostly for supporting roles.

-If it helps, John Carpenter himself wasn't against the idea of a remake at all. He even helped a bit with this film. But then again, when at least one of your actors had a part to play in "Smallville", chances are you won't exactly end up with Oscar-material.

Image Gallery

That mouth's just good for sucking.

International waters can't keep them away.

ARRRRRGH...why does this film exist?!
From the fog comes agony from this.
DiD wE MenTIOn ThE MAkeRs oF HaLlOwEen maDE ThIS?!