“Come see how the vampires do it...again.”

Films: Dark Shadow (2012)

Alias: None

Type: Mystical

Location: Civilized Area

Height/Weight: That of an average human.

Affiliation: Good

Summary: Many decades ago, we told of the slightly farcical tale of a vampire seeking love in all of the wrong ways. But this isn't the Barnabas you're familiar with. This time, he's cursed...to be in a slightly-forgettable Tim Burton flick that ironically feels a lot more like Tim Burton than the rest of the generic guff he's done in recent memory.

History: Barnabas Collins was a wealthy young man back in the 18th century who moved to Maine with his family to establish business. But he rejected the advances of a witch named Angelique, who had his family murdered, his love killed, and him buried in a coffin after he was cursed to become a vampire. Cue the 1970s, and Barnabas has been uncovered accidentally. While openly perplexed by how much has changed, he's even more unpleasantly surprised to find that his family legacy has gone down the drain as a canning company. While repairing his family name, he falls in love again...and is still pursued by the mad Angelique.

Notable Kills: Nothing special.

Final Fate: After much Angelique-related havoc, Barnabas can finally get away from her when the ghost of one of his relatives screams so loud the witch is sent flying into a chandelier, killing her. The vampire's new love is then converted by him, with consent of course. However, a doctor who tried to use Barnabus' blood for immortality is revealed to be still alive...

Powers/Abilities: Super strength, floating.

Weakness: Sunlight.

Scariness Factor: 2.5-Barnabas has killed before in the name of subsistence, and he could very well kill again. But he's ultimately a good soul who just so happened to be really bad with girls back in the day. He's definitely creepy-looking, but seeing him fumble in the quasi-modern day is rather endearing, and in the end, he just wants the best for what remains of his family.

Trivia: -At the very least, Burton and Barnabas' actor, Johnny Depp, loved the original soap opera. So, it was a decent fit.

-Speaking of which, the original series lasted for 27, count 'em, 27 seasons. And many episodes are incredibly hard to find. However, the whole show has been released together in recent memory, so it's all good.

Image Gallery

Take the Duggar family for instance. Not this one.

Another part of the curse? Tar for tears. That's gotta hurt.
Sweeny Todd? Is that-oh, thank God.

Ruminate on your career just a little bit more.
In case you forgot this was Barnabas himself.

It's always a witch of a time with sympathetic vampires.