“Bear-ly parking at all”

Films: Bear (2010)

Alias: None

Type: Natural

Location: Forest

Height/Weight: That of an average grizzly.

Affiliation: Neutral

Summary: Remember that killer bear movie from last decade that involved a bunch of unlikable teens getting effortlessly picked off by a pissed-off mama grizzly? Well, we have another film of a similar flavor. Only this time, the teens can't even make it past their car.

History: While driving along the American countryside, a bunch of reckless youths took a shortcut that ended in a flat tire. A grizzly bear approached, and one of the idiots promptly shot it dead. But all that got them was the ire of the bear's mate, who was more than a bit perturbed at their hubris. Now, these guys are all in trouble as the bear does all it can to slaughter them one by one.

Notable Kills: Nothing special.

Final Fate: After killing all but one, the bear spares the pregnant survivor, owing to a Native American legend that all bears are reincarnated shamans that can read human emotions. It could be true, it could be just dumb luck. Either way, the bear has triumphed tonight.

Powers/Abilities: None.

Weakness: Anything conventional.

Scariness Factor: 4-It may be just a regular bear faffing around a wrecked car most of the time, but all of you are probably aware that "just a regular bear" almost always translates still to "razor-clawed death machine that could swipe your head off at any point". Indeed, one must wonder how the filmmakers managed to corral this beast into doing all it did. Sure, the practical/digital effects are a bit lacking, but they are very rare, and the real bear is the true star of forest fright here.

Trivia: -The role of the bear was given to Blue, a huge male grizzly resident of the Bear-Necessities Ranch.

-This film was directed by Roel Reine, who did it as "John Rebel", and would use the same pseudonym when he later did another film about forest predators. Namely, 2011's "Wolf Town". How much longer until he finally gets to doing one about mountain lions or, dare we dream, a homicidal moose?

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