"Keep Your Kaiju on a Short Leash"

Films: Gamera Vs. Guiron (1969)

Alias: Guilon, Guillon

Type: Alien

Location: Eldritch Location/Mountains

Height/Weight: 85 meters and 110 metric tons.

Affiliation: Evil

Summary: Gamera could never let any annoying kids out of his sight. Every time something monster-related happens to them on his homeland, he's there to clean up their mess. And unfortunately, these kids happened to be a bunch of idiots that got him under the business end of one of his more bizarre foes: the knife-nosed Guiron.

History: As it turns out, Gyaos is but a fraction of the scourge of her species. Mainly because it expands across planets. Indeed "Space Gyaos" were woefully abundant, reducing the planet Terra to a scorched landscape with nothing but rocks and bodies of water to go around. But something drove them off and killed them. And it wasn't Gamera. It was Guiron, who became a sort of watchdog to the last surviving Terrans, Barbella and Florbella. Due to having a taste for brains, the Terrans sent an unmanned saucer to Earth to pick up some human takeout. A couple of nimrod humans decided to give the saucer a joyride, and ended up in the aliens' clutches. Cue Gamera having to save them from the Terrans and the belligerent Guiron.

Notable Kills: How did Guiron kill the Space Gyaos back then? By literally slicing them up and taking them apart piece by piece. By cheezy kaiju standards, Guiron doesn't goof around.

Final Fate: After forcing Gamera to retreat several times, the turtle finally gains the upper hand by shoving his knife nose into the ground. The monster now subdued, the kids launch some rockets at the Terrans' main base, one of which Gamera throws into a hole in Guiron's knife. After Gamera ignites it, Guiron is blown up in half, killing him, and leaving Terra a planet without war or urban chaos (no, not traffic accidents, you stupid American dub).

Powers/Abilities: Guiron's knife is his greatest weapon, capable of deflecting the Gyaos' infamous cutter beam and slicing through Gamera's shell with some effort. The knife also comes with hidden shuriken launchers that fire with deadly accuracy. And if someone tries to get away, Guiron can leap and swim great distances. He's a rather strong fellow despite his size.

Weakness: Guiron's shuriken launch accuracy can be reduced if he's in a state of shock or fatigue.

Scariness Factor: 4-Until now, the only creature known to kill Gyaos was Gamera. Guiron has the blood of thousands of them on his knife. Though despite his impressive credentials and visceral fighting style, his knife is a little distracting in a goofy way, and his expression looks incredibly bored all the time. Then again, considering his day job, who's to say he’s not seen it all by now?

Trivia: -Guiron's name is derived from the guillotine, an ancient mechanism for lawful execution designed to chop off a victim's head.

-The film's dubbing, known as the Sandy Frank/Pedro dub, is often considered one of the primmest examples of a "blind-idiot" translation out there, with the infamous "traffic accidents" line and planets being called stars. To add insult to injury, the voice actors themselves sound bored and half-asleep at best.

Image Gallery

Yeah, Gamera's already doomed.

Looking a bit scrawny, guys.

Guiron demonstrates the "No-Sell" attack move.

The pathetic death of a butcher.

Kong goes up against his strongest foes yet! Except not really.
"Hey, I'm in the movie too. Or...whatever."


Guiron at work.