"Long Distance A.I Relationships"

Films: Colossus: The Forbin Project (1970)

Alias: The Forbin Project

Type: Man-Made

Location: Civilized area

Height/Weight: Incalpulable

Affiliation: Neutral, leaning on Evil

Summary: A power built solely on A.I is a fool's fortress. There's only so much an artificial intelligence can do before it starts dealing in absolutes. Colossus was no exception.

History: The brainchild of Charles Forbin, Colossus was made with the intention of preventing any form of war. It seemed to work smoothly, but then it was revealed that Russia had its own system by the name of Guardian. Colossus actually found itself wanting to communicate with Guardian, but everyone kept wanting to pull the plug. This would not sit well, as it caused Colossus and Guardian to fire nukes at eachother.

Notable Kills: See Final Fate.

Final Fate: The nuke heading for the U.S. is dismantled, but Russia gets hit with one before it can be stopped. Colossus then detonates some warheads when people continue to try and subdue it. At that point, Colossus announces that with Forbin and what remains of Guardian's help, it will become the new world order, ending war and human pride simultaneously.

Powers/Abilities: Access to all U.S. superweapons and adaptation to new technology.

Weakness: None.

Scariness Factor: 5-Forbin, who's the dingus who suggested that this thing need not require a kill code, or at least some kind of failsafe. This creepy monotone-speaking machine is what would happen if HAL-9000 were on Earth and had literally nothing standing in its way. The U.S. doesn't own it, it owns the U.S.!

Trivia: -There have been some sequel novels written about Colossus following the book the film was based on. To give you an idea of how absurd they are, they involve Forbin becoming Grand Priest to Colossus and Martians capable of terminating it all.

-Colossus was voiced by Mel Blanc's counterpart in terms of the title, "Man of a Thousand Voices", Paul Frees.

Image Gallery

The new age would like to forget this awkward man front and center.

"No, I am not related to the Illuminati. Why do you ask?"

Humanity is utterly incompetent, even when brilliant.

Spoilers: We Suck.

I wouldn't finish that sentence.

Hey! Don't give away the twist.

Even when it's bringing forth another supercomputer, Russia can't win.